One year ago today, two dazed and exhausted adults entered a Civil Affairs office in Kunming, China, to meet a small, curious baby with a lot of hair who was going to be part of their family forever. It probably wasn't a very good day for the baby. These strangers with their big noses and funny way of talking weren't all bad, of course. They carried her almost the whole rest of the day, and they never had to put her down to tend to somebody else. But they didn't know the right way to fix her bottle, and she was hungry and tired and everything was strange. At night, instead of sleeping in her own little crib, with the other babies in their little cribs all around her and a familiar ayi to watch over her, she was put to bed in a big crib with no-one else in the room but the two strangers. No wonder she cried herself to sleep!
But this was a baby who knew how to make the best of things. Even on that first day, she tried new foods and laughed at her new parents' silliness. Before long, she had decided that she liked these people and wanted to stick with them. And her parents learned, too: the right way to fix a bottle, what kinds of things she liked to play with, how to tell when she was sleepy, and where her tickle spots were. All the transitions from hotel to hotel were hard, but as time went by, the three began to feel more and more liked they belonged together.
Looking back, it's amazing how much can happen in a year.
The baby who, at nine and a half months, was on the cusp of crawling and could barely sit up straight is now a toddler who walks confidently up and down steps (sometimes without holding on to anything!), launches herself gleefully down the highest slide on the playground, and climbs anything we'll let her (as well as a few things we'd rather she didn't).
The baby who was used to getting most of her nutrition from a bottle (but LOVED trying solids) is now a toddler who will still eat anything, but only if she can feed it to herself, preferably with a spoon or fork.
The baby who loved fingering objects with interesting textures is now a toddler who can open and close locks and take the lids off all sorts of containers.
Most importantly, the baby who wasn't too sure about being left with these strangers now gives us hugs and demands kisses; quiets down instantly when we pick her up after a bad dream; revels in our attention; and copies such random details of our (often unconscious!) behavior that she leaves us in stitches.
Then there are some things that haven't changed! When we got our referral for her, it contained some information about her habits and personality. As we got to know her, we discovered that whoever had written the information up must have known her pretty well, because it was spot-on! Here are some of our favorite excerpts:
1. "When she sees food, she wants to eat." We quoted this a lot during our first weeks together! We learned pretty early on in our history with Esther and bottles that the minute she saw a bottle she would cry for it until it was in her mouth, so we had to try not to let her see us during the preparation phase. We also couldn't eat in front of her unless she was eating too, which meant eating in shifts the entire time we were in China. Even now, she will kick up a huge fuss if we eat anything in front of her that she can't have (like nuts). This child loves food! Another comment in her report was that "She can accept food that she's never eaten before," and that is still true as well. When we were in China we switched formulas and flavors of rice porridge on her several times, and she either didn't notice or didn't care. She will try absolutely anything, and likes almost everything, including raw onion, vegemite, and fresh, unsweetened cranberries. She does not, however, care for Swiss cheese. Oh, I don't think she cares for spicy hot food either. I gave her some once, and she not only ate very little, but rubbed her tongue afterwards.
2. "very active, high-energy" Yes, it does require both adjectives to adequately describe our girl! One of the most frequent comments we get about her is, "She has a lot of energy, doesn't she?" (Maybe that explains why a child who loves to eat as much as she does is barely on the bottom of the growth chart for weight! It certainly explains why I've lost weight in the last year.) Esther loves to be on the go, and would probably spend all day outside if I were willing to stay out all day with her. (This morning I got out of the shower--with wet hair--to find Esther with her shoes on, waiting to drag me to the door. She was quite offended when I wouldn't take her outside to play in the steady rain and 50-degree temperatures.)
3. "loves to listen to music" And loves to have one of us dance her around to music! That can get tiring...
4. "loves to be held....When she cries, if anyone holds her, she will stop." They neglected to mention that the person holding her has to be standing up! With all her energy, she has never tolerated being held by someone sitting in a chair, unless she really wasn't feeling well. (Lately she has let me hold and and rock her as long as I sing at the same time--but if I stop singing, she's out of there!) However, she will calm down remarkably quickly if one of us will walk with her. This is what got us through our first day together, and it has gotten us through many nights of teething and illness since. She also loves to be carried around on someone's shoulders.
5. "very playful...loves to laugh...loves to be teased" Now Esther has turned this around and loves to tease! When I go to get my shoes on, for example, she will sometimes grab them and run away with them, hoping to be chased. She also loves playing hide-and-seek, being tickled, and doing silly things (like putting a stuffed animal on her head).
6. "She responds positively to strangers and novel stimuli." If one of the comments we get most frequently about her refers to her energy, the other is, "She's not shy, is she?" Esther LOVES people, and will often wave madly at total strangers, saying "Hi! Hi! Hi!" until they respond. (She does not, however, like to be picked up by people until she's been around them for a little while, and sometimes not then.) She also loves anything new and interesting. We call her our Curious Esther.
And after a year of sharing life with this amazing little person, we are still occasionally exhausted, but much less dazed, and so incredibly blessed. It's good to be family! Happy family day, Esther!
We weren't quite sure what would be the best way to celebrate Family Day with a child too young to understand what the fuss was all about. But we definitely wanted it to be a special day for Esther, and we wanted to somehow affirm her history of becoming part of our family.
vegemite
Esther also likes to "help" Daddy play his guitar. Here she is checking out how it feels to be in a guitar case.
Of course, listening to the music is pretty cool, too.
Esther's turn to play!
Today was absolutely beautiful! It was sunny, windy, and in between warm and cool. Esther and I went to the botanical gardens of Wheaton Regional Park in the early afternoon and had a fabulous time. I even managed to get some good pictures of her--which, considering that she rarely stays in one position for more than two seconds, was an accomplishment! So, for your viewing pleasure, here is Esther enjoying spring!
The bridge was one of Esther's favorite stops. (The other was a fountain which I didn't get any good pictures of.)
Esther is beginning to be able to go down steps by herself without holding on to anything!
This picture is totally posed. Esther was not terribly interested in these flowers--she would much rather have been heading back towards the fountain!
